I’d like to offer all of you a very random moment of a personal admittance:
From time to time I indulge in Funky Dineva. Why? Because I find his thoughts and theories phenomenally insightful.
With that said, recently I came across this video which was shared with me by a close friend. She was keen of asking my thoughts on this issue. Now, before I speak on them, it’s imperative that you watch the video (if you haven’t already).
I only have one thing to say, then I will get into my own thoughts.
DINEVA, YOU HAVE HIT THE PROVERBIAL NAIL RIGHT ON THE HEAD!
The unfortunate truth of my life is that I have been single for well into a decade now. Truly, it is not from lack of trying but from scarcity of quality.
Call me selective, but I need a mate that will enhance my existence, not be a detriment to it.
I have never been the sort to settle, and as it seems, in today’s society there is a growing trend of settling for less than what one is worth or what one wants.
Before I go any further, I suppose it is important to point out several facts about myself that most do not know. However, in knowing, the general public may be able to understand. Perhaps even relate.
Fact Number 1:
While my vocabulary may be expansive, that by no means implies that I am obnoxious or arrogant. On the contrary; I am a gentle soul. I am kind, understanding and bighearted. Moreover, most consider me easy to talk to.
Fact Number 2:
I am sapiosexual. Am I gay? Yes. Being gay simply does not imply that one is attracted to any man. I am solely attracted to men that stimulate my mind. In stimulating my mind, they in turn stimulate my body.
Fact Number 3:
I am not now, nor have I ever been the needy sort. I love and appreciate my independence. As a matter of fact, I NEED IT. Due to this, I cannot be with a needy, jealous man.
Fact Number 4:
The way to my heart is by your ears. Yes, that’s correct. Not my stomach, but rather, your ears. This is to say, that a man will win me over, if he just listens to me.
No, I do not mean obey, nor do I mean that he should never speak.
What I do mean is an equal give and take of conversation and listening.
It saddens me to admit that even with the little that I require, it is still impossible to find a partner that will fit the bill. Please understand that I am very pragmatic and DO HAVE realistic expectations. I never thought of life as a fairy tale. I’ve never been one to believe in perfection either. I am willing to be with the right man for ALL of his VIRTUES AND FAULTS. What I cannot do is settle for less than I want and need. “What is that?” you might be pondering.
Well, it is the following:
A kind, caring, well spoken, intellectual man, who is neither needy, nor jealous. That is it. And, as small as this list might be, I still find it impossible to fulfill.
In recent weeks I’d started dating a man who was kind, caring, not needy or jealous, BUT was less than intelligent. This was displayed in his nonsensical form or processing information. Something which, unfortunately, led to his reacting to certain situations in an ill-advised manner. This was no fault of his, to be sure, for one cannot make intelligence bloom where the soil is effete.
Nevertheless, it played an enormous part in the fact that I am no longer seeing him. You see, at times I would speak to him on subjects of considerable importance, and he would nod his understanding. Yet, in due time, when it was time for him to act on the matter, I realized that his interpretation of what I’d said was askew. It fell extraordinarily short of what I’d actually said.
After this happened, I took some time to reflect inwardly on the past decade and my encounters with potential suitors. When I did, I realized that a trend arose.
- Most men advertised themselves as something they were not, leading me to believe that they might be the right man for me.
- The general public had developed an unrealistic expectation of what the dating world should be, and in the attempt to adapt to it, they created a persona that is not genuine to themselves.
- Men like myself are in short supply. I do not say this to sound ostentatious, but as a real analysis.
- The men I AM INTERESTED, ARE NOT interested in me, for they have their own set of expectations which, in all actuality, might never be met.
So, it is with a heavy heart and a sound mind, that I’ve come to the unfathomable conclusion that I might never find what I am looking for. Thank you Dineva, for assuring me that I am not alone in the matter. 😦
Until next time,